The Cheap-Ass Cosmetician: Eye Makeup Remover

OK, I know it’s not “gourmet” or “food”, but I have to share this one with you.

As a certified (or certifiable…) Female Smiter, I do get tired of the ripoffs we girls endure at the hands of the so-called Beauty Industry. And do not get me started on dry-cleaning costs (really? $7 for a blouse?) and menstrual products. Just don’t.

Bubble, bubble -- not much trouble.

Bubble, bubble — not much trouble.

Anyway, I am also a Makeup-Wearin’ Smiter and while makeup itself can last a decent while, the stuff required to remove it typically does not — and of course costs an arm and a leg.

About a year ago I got heartily sick of forking out ten bucks a pop for something that is basically eye-friendly liquid soap and water, and it suddenly occurred to me to wonder where else I might find soap that doesn’t sting your eyes. That causes… er… no more tears.

And what to my Smitering eyes should appear but baby shampoo.

So without further ado, here is my little recipe for Cheap-Ass Eye Makeup Remover.

You will need:

  • Baby shampoo (your choice; I used Life Brand [Shoppers Drug Mart] because it was on sale)
  • Filtered water (mine came straight out of my Brita filter)
  • a small clean/sterile bottle (I used the empty bottle from some brand-name eye makeup remover. Ha ha!)

Mix the shampoo and water in the bottle, in a ratio of about 2 parts shampoo to 3 parts water. You don’t need to be too exact unless you’re really into that sort of thing. In which case, have at it.

Put the cap on the bottle & turn it gently from side to side, end to end, to mix it all up. (Shaking it will cause nothing but foam.)

Use as you would your regular super-pricey product — cotton pad, wipe eyes & face wherever there is crud that needs to come off.  Rinse skin gently with warm water afterwards.

Probably works well to bathe cuts & scrapes too.

Now, let's see if we can duplicate this at home... Oh yes.

Now, let’s see if we can duplicate this at home… Oh yes.

Total cost per batch:

  • Bottle of baby shampoo: $3.99, divided by about 50 = 8 cents per mix.

You’re welcome.

Take THAT, beauty industry.

— Smiter out.


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